The first addition to my resource section in a very long time is a selection of practices I’ve been relying on lately to help me process intense inner experiences.
Throughout 2020 there has been a steady current of intense transformational energy that doesn’t seem to quit.
It’s all about collective transformation, and you’ll feel it via chunks of time when you can’t understand why you feel so anxious and/or why you’re experiencing panic attacks or PTSD type symptoms.
This energy is waking up a lot of people to their capacity to empathize with the collective. As humans, it’s our destiny to connect beyond the physical. Our evolution entails becoming attuned to the other, not just the self.
And it makes sense. If we can feel the energy of the other, we wouldn’t hurt them. We would work together in a more harmonious way.
As people begin to ascend into new levels of feeling beyond the 3D, the inner experience becomes very strong.
The intensity is transient. But speaking from my personal experience this year, there haven’t been a lot of breaks in the intensity.
I mean, really, this whole year has been one big tower moment, and those are intense. A lot of fear being processed steadily.
What I’m saying is, if you’re having a hard time, if you had a hard time, or if you have a hard time in the coming months (November is sure to be a big one) remember you’re not alone.
I’m with you, and a lot of other people are, too.
Also remember that there are resources that can help you through these moments of intensity, which I’m realizing as I incorporate the following practices and intel into my day to day life.
Psoas Muscle Work & Belly Breathing
I got into belly breathing after an Ayurvedic consult. You basically inhale into the belly, and while you exhale, you try to keep your belly distended.
The idea is to create space in the abdomen, allowing the breathe to expand beyond the lungs, where it defaults to when we are in a hyper vigilant anxious state.
I did it for a while, then kind of forgot about it. I say kind of because it felt so awkward and counter to what I usually do, which is draw my breath upward into my chest and neck.
Which, for the record, I do not recommend. Yout get a lot of neck and shoulder issues with this way of breathing along with increased anxiety.
So I purposely let belly breathing drop from my schedule, then picked it back up when my massage therapist recommended, for the second time, thta I work on breathing into my diaphragm and belly. And that I research the psoas muscle and its relation to anxiety.
Belly breathing can sometimes trigger more anxiety if you over do it, so mind the desire to get obsessive (spoken from recent experience.) But it’s a very interesting idea, to think that focusing on directing breathe to the diaphragm and belly can actually massage your organs and soothe the vagus nerve.
The vagus nerve is related to PTSD and trauma so get to know it and what it can do depending on the state it’s in. If/when its triggered, it affects your ability to breathe fully and deeply, another thing I know from experience, which in turn causes more anxiety.
Psoas is connected to all of this. I don’t feel comfortable speaking too much on it yet as I’m new to the party. But I will say that “The Psoas Book” is a really valuable resource for those who suffer from chronic anxiety, particularly issues with breathing due to anxiety.
I found the exercise offered within it very grounding and soothing throughout my last foray into the PTSD abyss. And I’m going to begin rolfing treatment as it was referenced a couple of times in the book so far, even though it sounds like something I did outside a cowboy bar in my 20s. Feel free to email me a reminder to write something about it if it interests you.
Certain moon phases trigger emotional responses. For me, it’s the 3rd quarter, when the sun is opposite my moon. This happens roughly 7 days after every full moon.
I find on these evenings my body vibrates. I’m tired but there is this pulsing energy that refuses to let my brain shut off or my body relax. No matter how many herbal supplements I take I can’t seem to relax my nervous system or sleep.
I’ve taken to tracking the moons and realized this happens every month. Knowing it does helps me refrain from thinking there is something seriously wrong with me when I get these intense symptoms.
An added bonus of knowing this is recalling that the moon is the fastest moving planet, ie how I feel won’t last long. I find I can chill more, ie not freak my freak when this feeling shows up for its monthly 12-24 hours.
If this idea of tracking moons interests you I recommend the book Moonology by Yasmin Boland. It’s an easy and fun read. A great reference for understanding what certain moons mean and how they might influence your inner experience. She also has a really lovely oracle deck of the same name.
Get to Know Your Astrological Archetypes
This is something you’d need to go a lot deeper with, as studying astrology is not a simple task. It takes a long term study, or, finding someone fabulous to get your birth chart read by. I recommend that if you can swing it.
That said, there are certain energies we experience that can be called out within the context of an astrological chart; certain astrological placements that can speak to the inner shake-ups we feel.
I always feel better if I can understand a bit about why I’m feeling the way I feel. Astrology has been wonderful at providing the insights I seek.
I’ll use a couple of my placements as an example and hope it’s not too confusing, and that you won’t judge me for being a Gemini Rising (Fun fact: after 3 years of thinking I was a Libra rising I ordered my exact time and it was 13 hours different than the time I’d been told. I laughed like a hyena in the post office parking lot, something my friend Lara shared was “something a Gemini rising would do.” On point and I love it.)
I have Sun opposite Pluto, which means I have the archetype of the lord of self, the ego, the sovereign, butting heads with the Lord of the underworld, the transformer. This energy – this conflict – exists within me on the regular.
That dynamic can get overwhelming, ‘cause survey says: the ego likes to be comfortable. And transformation doesn’t F with comfort. So there is inherently a story playing out within me that can get hairy, and trust me when I say it does.
I feel conflicted a lot. Plus I attract weird experienced with people, but that’s a whole other conversation. Overall though, I am constantly evolving as a person, and every time I do, shit gets intense. But after every intense inner and outer experience, I feel rejuvenated and empowered. And cool stuff always happens.
I’ll share one more placement: I have the Moon, which is the nurturer, the mother energy, squaring Saturn, the master of discipline. So this dynamic entails tradition challenging my need to feel my emotions; rules fighting with my need for nourishment. These hugely play into my inner environment, ie anxiety, particularly when either planet is triggered by transits.
Astrology is a rabbit hole I love to dive into. I research and study regularly (midheaven in the 9th, the house of astrology? That makes sense) though I am not at the point of calling myself an astrologer. But I realize that the obsession is turning into something more. And I dig into astrological archetypes in readings because I know enough to notice a square or opposition that could be influencing a person’s inner experience.
Plus, as I talked about in this post I really believe astrology is one of the most powerful forms of validation known to humanity.
Imagine a road map to your life, albeit an abstract one, offering glimpses into who you are, in ways that no friend, parent, teacher or partner ever could. That’s what you get when you take the time to get to know who you are within the context of the stars.
As far as referring people to a specific astrologer, I don’t have one at this time. You can always send me an email and I can ask a friend of mine. But most of what I’ve learned has come from my own research or chatting with friends who feel as connected to it as I do. Though I would recommend astrology university as a starting point to find someone as I have grown very fond of the incredible content it offers.
Love to all. If you have a question about anything I’ve shared, feel free to reach out.